Conversing with another human is well-recognised as one of the most profoundly enjoyable activities a person can undertake, yet we consistently underestimate the potential for “small talk” – about apparently boring subjects – to enthral and stimulate us, a new study suggests.
Take the famous scene in the film Pulp Fiction, by Quentin Tarantino, in which two hitmen are on the way to a job, and the characters, played by John Travolta and Samuel L Jackson, are talking about menu differences between McDonald’s in Europe and America.
“You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?”
“They don’t call it a Quarter Pounder with Cheese?”
The apparently mundane subject of the back and forth illustrates how conversations about “ordinary topics can become unexpectedly captivating”, the research team noted, with the scene going on to become a cultural touchstone.
What’s more, such low-key interactions may actually be good for us, boosting mental and physical wellbeing, the researchers said.
“We tend to assume that if a topic sounds dull, the conversation will be dull too,” said Elizabeth Trinh, MA, a doctoral student at the University of Michigan and lead author of the research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. “But that’s not what people actually experience.”
The team conducted nine experiments involving a total of 1,800 participants and the researchers found people consistently underestimated how interesting and enjoyable conversations about topics they considered to be “boring” would be.
The experiments involved asking participants to predict how much they thought they would enjoy holding a conversation about specific topics they identified as boring.
The numerous topics were highly varied and included the first and second world wars nonfiction books, the stock market, cats, and vegan diets.
In some of the experiments, participants suggested topics they believed they’d find boring – including maths, onions and Pokemon.
The participants then had real conversations with strangers or friends, in person or online. Afterwards, they reported how much they enjoyed the conversations.
This revealed a clear pattern: Across the experiments, people expected the conversations to be dull, but afterwards they found they had enjoyed them much more than they had anticipated. This pattern held even when both people agreed the topic under discussion was boring.
The research team noted that the topic of conversation and whether the people conversing already knew one another played an outsized role in whether people thought a conversation might be interesting.
“People not only underestimate how much they will enjoy talking to strangers, but also do not realize that the topic matters less than they think,” the researchers said.
They suggested that people should consider reframing their attitudes to conversations, asking themselves “what can I learn?”, rather than being overly concerned about whether they will be interested in the topic.
The researchers said that once people had started talking, the interaction itself tended to become more important than the topic.
“What really drives enjoyment is engagement,” Ms Trinh said. “Feeling heard, responding to each other, and discovering unexpected details about someone’s life can make even a mundane topic meaningful.”
The team said their findings matter because our social connections play a vital role in mental and physical health. Strong interpersonal relationships are linked to greater well-being and lower risk of loneliness.
“If people avoid conversations because they expect them to be boring, they may miss easy chances to connect,” the team said.
“If we skip talking to a coworker at the coffee machine, a neighbour in the elevator, or a stranger at an event, we may be missing small moments of connection,” Ms Trinh said.
“Even a brief conversation about everyday life may be more rewarding than we expect.”